The ups and downs as summer ends

Summer vacation is officially done! The kids are back in school and I am enjoying the peacefulness of school days.
Having 3 kids at home for three months straight was tough this summer. All 3 kids are so different from each other, each needing a different type of parenting.

My oldest have a development disability meant he needed me to get him up and dressed and fed every day. He needs physical support to get from one room to another which is hard in it own way but as a 12yr old big brother he also preferred to be in his room away from his wild and rambunctious younger sisters. So although he needed me through out the day for certain care, emotionally he was happy to go along doing his own thing.

My younger two need more of my direct parenting. I have a highly emotional 8yr old. She deals with varying levels of anxiety. With this anxiety it often affects how she can deal with normal sibling squabbles. As she gets older, she is wanting to independently explore her own hobbies and she’s not always keen on including her younger sister. She’s also my rule follower and when that’s mixed with my little 6yr old rebel it often creates fireworks… even if its just because the younger one doesn’t want to follow the ‘rules’ my 8yr old has set out for playing.

Now that we’ve made through and our days will be filled with school and soccer, I look back and part of me still wishes I had more of those days. But I now appreciate having my time back.

I remember how hard the days were before they were even in school. Getting through those toddler years seem like a blur. But it really was a fun blur!

Now I see them having friends and hobbies and becoming their own people separate from me. As a mom, this is our goal. Raise these kids to become who they are meant to be. For them to create a life of their own. But there is a certain sadness in this. I cherish the moments of hugs and cuddles where we connect in a way only a mother can with her child.

It’s that feeling of a piece of your soul being attached to your body and it gets up and walks away to be its own soul but my soul still feels attached. I can’t even put in to words the way it feels when that little soul comes back to me with a big smiles of all they’ve experienced in the day. Those moments make me feel so deliriously happy I’m their mom and I get to experience this life with them.

I know even though I’ll be enjoying my alone time to get things done during the day, every day I’ll be counting down to school pick up so I can hear all about their day!  Here’s to all the moms out there struggling to get through the toddler blur years and to all the mom’s sending their babies into the world to learn and grow!

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